Friday, December 30, 2005

Dragonfiles and butterflies

I think I'll go with the butterfly/dragonfly theme. Here are some things I found...

I like the wall painting of the butterfly/dragonfly

This one is my favorite.

I also looked at co-sleepers today. I don't think that will work because she will be too old for one so maybe we can just put one side of the crib down and push it up against our bed. Or we could get a toddler bed and put in between our bed and the wall. I just don't know yet.

Over on APC they posted that the CCAA said the lid through April 25th were matched. Why am I telling you this? Because I'm trying to watch the trend. It's been said that it will now take 8 to 10 months to be matched with totally sucks!! If we get our dossier to China in March that means a referral in November/December and no travel until 2007!!! Hopefully CCAA will pick up some speed again next year and cut it back down to the 6 or 7 month time frame. That would been September/October referral and be back home with little one for Christmas - wouldn't that be wonderful?? Oh, I can only dream!!

Have a great weekend and Happy New Year!!!!

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Corner Nursery

Our house has 3 bedrooms and 2 baths. One of my goals before little one comes home was to enclose our carport and convert it into the 4th bedroom. Well, after talking with T about it we decided to wait until our oldest goes to college and then little one can have her own room. Young T has decided that he wants to go to an out of state college. :( No, I'm not happy about that one bit - but it is his decision....anyway I digress - back to the nursery. I had visions of decorating a little girls nursery, painting the walls, picking the theme, buying the decorations, and putting it all together but that plan was dashed. So I walked into our bedroom and looked around and figured, yes, it can be done. I can move the computer to my oldest's room (he will be absolutley thrilled with this!) and create a "corner nursery." It will have her crib and probably a rocker. I can still paint the corner and decorate the corner. Yes, this will definitely work!! I'll post a picture in the future (far future) of the finished "corner nursery". Hmmmmm......I'm thinking dragon flies and butter flies....rolling hill scene on the and trees, a cloud or two, birds, and of course a ladybug.....

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Paper Chase Blues

So we got our bc's back from NY last week all pretty and certified but our mc has to go to the County to be certified and then back to the state. Jeez......give me a break. I'm also going to call our social worker today and make sure we are still on for tomorrow night. As I said earlier she had a death in the family and wasn't sure if she would be able to make it or not but I haven't heard from her at all. And I still don't have the references yet.....

We are getting closer - slowly - but we are getting closer!!

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

It's Merry Christmas not Happy Holidays!!

Yes, I know, this is supposed to be an adoption blog but I just had to remind people why we even have the "holiday season". We got a notice today about our "Holiday Breakfast". Huh?? It should have been about our Christmas breakfast. Mark Jacobson, a car dealer here in NC, was saying the poem "The night before Christmas" with a few changes to correspond to his dealership. At the end where it is suppose to say "Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night" he says "Happy holidays to all..." Why are people doing this? So they won't "offend" anyone. OK people, here's something that might just shock you.....we wouldn't have this "Holiday season" if it weren't for Christmas and the birth of Jesus!! It just amazes me how people have forgotten the real reason for the season!!

Jesus is the reason for the Season!!!

Friday, December 16, 2005

Package received!

I sent our birth and marriage certificates to Albany NY on December 13 to be certified. The package was sent "delivery confirmation receipt" and it was delivered TODAY!!! YEAH!!

Your item was delivered at 5:14 am on December 16, 2005 in ALBANY, NY 12231

When they come back I can send them on to be authenticated. One small step forward.

T went to see the sw yesterday for his one-on-one interview. Took him a total of 15 minutes. She told him afterwards that she has had a death in the family and will not be able to keep our 28th appointment. Okay, now she told him on the 15th.....why wouldn't she be able to keep the 28th's appointment I just don't know. Doesn't make much sense to me but it really doesn't matter since we can't get our fingerprints done until January 28th anyway. I'll give her a call tonight and reschedule it..AGAIN!!

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Fingerprint Appointment Woes

Finally!! We got our fingerprint appointment letter. But wait, our appointment isn't until January 28th!!!! Our filing date is 11/10/05 why is our fingerprint appointment months afterwards???? I've called them to see if we could get in sooner and of course we can't. much for being DTC in January!! That's not gonna happen. It takes something like 3 months to get the elusive 171H back - 3 months from the filing date. That means we should get it sometime in February and hopefully we can be DTC in March. That, my dear friends, means we won't get our dd until 2007!! ugh!!!! T goes to see the social worker this Thursday and I've yet to get his physical straightened out. I've also got to get the our references to write those letters...come on people - lets get a move on please!!

On to better things - Christmas!! I love this time of year! Watching the boys open their gifts is something I look forward to. I've done some shopping but have not finished everything - gasp - I know, there are 12 days until Christmas....but I will finish!! The boys are so hard to buy for this year - they want ipods and 4 wheelers and bb guns and new tvs and an xbox 360 - guess I better get outside and chop down that tree that has all the money it it! haha!!

Merry Christmas!!

Friday, December 09, 2005

Telling people our plans

Ok, so I've told a few people here at work of our plans to adopt from China and I've received great responses. Now I've made the official fun!! Why China? Why not here? What does she look like - oh, you don't know yet? That's weird...How much will she cost? Why does it take so long? You have to go to China? If they have so many girls why don't they just send them here so you don't have to travel?

I was warned - I know I was but I didn't think people would actually ask these things!

Paperchase update - ha!! Nothing to update! DH's doctor still screwed up his physical form so he has to go back AGAIN!!! My doctor will sign mine today when I go get my bp checked one more time. No fingerprint appointment yet...grrrr. I talk with the sw today for our one on one interview and dh goes next week. This sw has cancelled on me twice now...hope that isn't a bad omen.

This is a picture of Hope, a little girl I used to watch. Her mom and dad gave her, yes gave her, to a friend of mine. This friend kept Hope for just a about a year, even when the mom and dad moved away. Finally they took her back - we were all heartbroken. I still think of Hope quite often!!

Monday, December 05, 2005

Jazzy is a Hit!!

I'm sure you are wondering who Jazzy is. She is our little 5 lb pom that our sw just fell in love with. It seemed she was much more interested in her than what we had to say. Then she met our 75 lb black lab KaCee. The visit went very well. She asked her questions about religion, our marriage, how we met, what we do for discipline, etc. Everyone told me not to worry about this visit and they were right. It was very easy and she hardly looked at the house. Just a quick walk through and that was that!! In our paperwork from CCAI it states that the sw can do 3 of the 4 interviews at one time but our sw wanted nothing to do with that. So now I go and see her this Thursday and then dh goes next week and our final meeting is the week after Christmas. Ugh!!! I wanted this done before Christmas but I guess that isn't going to happen. I expressed my wish to have the final draft in my hand by the middle of January but who knows. Oh well, I'm sure God has a plan for us it is just hard for us to see it right now. Oh by the way, she didn't even eat one of those cookies!!!

My son's baptism was wonderful. Yes, I cried and dh had tears in his eyes. He was one of 3 that got baptized. When he went in the baptismal the pastor had to motion him to squat down because he was taller that him!! Everyone in the church got a laugh out of that. We are going to go out this week and celebrate with him. DH is working at the Christmas tree lot tonight and Ty has a wrestling tournament tomorrow so we'll try to do that on Wednesday.

We also talked again about names this weekend. DH said he actually likes the name Tommi and he went and got me his family tree paperwork so we can look through it for a middle name. We have a year to decide so we have plenty of time. Hmmmmm Tommi Jeanne?? NOT!!

Friday, December 02, 2005

Sunday is a big day for our family

Sunday my oldest son gets baptized and the social worker comes for her first visit!! Last weekend I cleaned the rugs and this weekend I'll scrub and mop everything else. I'm going to ask my neighbor if she'll come over around 12:30 and start making some cookies so that the house smells "homey" because I'm not sure what time we'll get home from church. We'll get the Christmas tree tonight and decorate it tomorrow after if falls. DH will put the outside lights up and clean up the yard so we should be all set. I'm kind of nervous about this because she can stop us from getting our daughter with one word!! When I've spoken to her she seemed to be very nice and we got off on the right foot so I'm probably freaking out for nothing, but I'm scared and nervous!!

Oh and I forgot about our pool. I gotta get my neighbor to fix something up so that it has a gate to keep out "little" girls. Right now it is wide open! I don't think the sw will like that one bit!!

So much to do!

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

What's In a Name??

Ok, I thought everyone would like how I combined my grandmother's first name, my mother's middle name, and my MIL's first name to Tianna Claire cn. My dh and ds's do NOT like this name at all. I think it's pretty and unique but they just won't have it. So I've found some other names that I'm going to run by the gang and see what they think. Here are a few:

Akia (pronounced Ah-key-ah)
Taryn Claire
Kera Faith
Skye/Skylar ?
Piper Ann
Marina ?
Kylie Faith
Lexi ?
Kennedy Faith (ha - I really like Faith as a middle name!!)
Kianna ?
Ava Claire
Kelsey Faith
Tehani Faith (pronounced te-ha-nee)

So many choices!!!

Monday, November 28, 2005


We celebrated Thanksgiving with my BIL. It was very relaxing and we had a great time. I was a little bit down because we usually spend this day with my mom and dad. They were unable to come into town because of her triple bypass 2 months ago. She isn't ready to travel yet - but we are looking forward to Christmas!!

When we walked into their house we were greeted warmly and then congratulated about our adoption plans. Everyone asked questions and seemed to be very happy for us. T's brother and sister in-law said they would be happy to be her guardian - they are my oldest son's godparents and have 2 young children so they were a natural to ask. T's other brother and sister in-law came up to us after dinner and said that they would like to give Logan some air miles so he can go to China too!!! What a wonderful surprise. They are his godparents and are two wonderful people!

We got T's doctors form back and as I was looking it over I notice that they marked his liver as abnormal! Huh?!! I asked T about it and he said he was unaware of anything being abnormal. This doctor is something else. T is going to call today and find out what is going on. Since they marked this as abnormal we will need to get a letter of explanation from them for the homestudy and for the dossier! What a pita!! I go to the doctors this friday for my physical and next Sunday is our first visit with the social worker. We are coming along slowly but surely!!

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

BC's,MC, and Telling the Family

I finally got my birth certificate in the mail!! Now I've sent all 3 certificates to NY to be certified and then I can send them to NYC Chinese Consulate to be authenticated. I'm also going to the clerk of court today to get our police records going and I will be picking up the boys forms from the doctors. Dh and I decided to clean out the attic this weekend. There is junk up there from when the boys were little! I'm going to have a massive yard sale in a few weeks. If I have time I'm also going to clean out my closet and the hall closet - pretty ambitious plan for the long weekend.

We are going to J & J's for Thanksgiving. I'm not able to get time off so we can't go to NY to see mom and dad. Usually mom is down here and the day after we hit the stores and all the crowds! I'm going to make some squash and an apple pie to bring. We haven't had Thanksgiving with them in many years so this will be a nice change. Plus we'll be able to see G, K & L's new little girl!

We also told his side of the family what our plans are. We composed an email and sent it to everyone with the who, what's and whys. The response from everyone has been very supportive. Everyone is excited for us and quite happy. When I told my youngest brother he said congrats and what can I do for you. When I told my other younger brother he said "Why China when there are so many kids right here in the US?" Should have known I'd get that response from him. My sister is excited also, but thinks we are completely out of our minds!! Both sets of nana's are happy and papa is too.

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Monday, November 21, 2005

No homestudy yet...

When I first called the social worker I left a message and waited a few days. When I wasn't called back I called her again and she sounded suprised to hear from me. She said she wanted to start this in December due to the holiday but I asked her to start in November so a meeting was scheduled for November 20th. As the time draws near I'm getting more and more nervous. I was so jumpy the day of the 19th - up until she left me a message saying "something unexpected came up" and she had to cancel...grrrr!!!!!!! I should have known better. I swear she just made the appointment for the 20th to appease me and knew all along she wouldn't be coming. Oh well - so now we have our first appointment on December 4th - a Sunday. (I just looked at an older post and see that I had wished for the hs to be on the 4th...LOL) This works better actually because my olders has a wrestling tournament on the 3rd and he wouldn't be there. We got our receipt from Homeland letting us know that we are "in the queue" for fingerprint appointments. DH got his BC but I haven't gotten mine yet. DH has had his physical and I've dropped off the paperwork for the boys. They just had one due to sports in school. I'm making an appointment today to get my physical complete.

Monday, November 14, 2005


Hey all. I've been in New York since the 11th of November. My mom had a stroke and she asked me to come see her. She is feeling fine and has had no major side effects from it but she is horribly depressed. Hopefully the new meds will start to kick in tomorrow.

Paperchase update - well, there isn't anything to update!! ugh!! I am NOT a patient person and this hurry up and wait thing is gonna drive me crazy. The first homestudy visit is this Saturday but I wish it was the 4th!! Hopefully when I get home I will have the bc's and mc that I ordered and I'll have a fingerprint appointment.

Names - mom thinks we should name her Tomisina Claire CN but I still like Tianna Claire. We'll see, we've got a whole year to think about it. The boys don't really like either name. T doesn't either. My oldest said Sara Elizabeth, who knows!!!!

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

First HomeStudy appointment

We have our first homestudy appointment set for November 19. I'm nervous about it but excited at the same time. Our social worker seems to be very nice. The oldest has a wrestling match that day but it is close by so T should be able to get back for it. The I600A came back to me due to the amount I sent...ugh!! I've also ordered BC for us and I've completed the adoption petition. Next is setting up doctor appointments for all 4 of us. I think that the pediatrician will not need to see the boys as they just had a physical for school sports.

Monday, October 31, 2005

China adoption - why China

Each year, thousands of children are adopted from the People's Republic of China with the numbers growing steadily. Last year, over 7,000 children born in China joined families in the U.S. through adoption. These children (predominantly girls) represent just the tip of the iceberg of a profound social phenomenon in China - the abandonment of hundreds of thousands of babies each year and the resulting development of an overburdened orphanage system to care for and raise them. This trend is the result of many complex societal forces in China, as the country struggles to limit its population growth.

The “One-child” Policy In the 1950s, China's leader, Mao Tse-Tung, urged his people to have more children to strengthen the country. The resulting growth of the population eventually led to great concern in the 1970s that China would be unable to feed its staggering population, since over 3/4 of the population lived on 1/3 of the land available for cultivation. Furthermore, China was historically prone to floods and famine compounding the problem. In 1979, when the Chinese represented 25% of the world's population, the government in China implemented a one-child policy to be overseen by the State Family Planning Commission. The intent was to limit families to having one child, in the hopes of keeping China's population under 1.3 billion by the year 2000. The baby boomers of the 1950s and 1960s were entering their reproductive years, and 2/3 of the population of China were under the age of 30. These factors made strict population containment appear essential to economic reform and improvement in the living standards. By the end of the year 2000, China's population was 1.26 billion or 21% of the world’s population but was expected to grow to 1.6 billion by 2050. With the attainment of the primary goal, reduced population growth, the one-child policy is generally still in effect today.

Contrary to first impression, the one-child rule applies to a minority of the population; for urban residents and government employees, the policy is strictly enforced, with a few exceptions in some areas for families in which the first child has a disability or both parents work in high-risk occupations or are themselves from one-child families. In rural areas which encompass approximately 70% of China's population, a second child is generally allowed five years after the first. However, application of this provision varies from province to province.

The policy is underpinned by a system of rewards and penalties, which are largely meted out at the discretion of local officials and vary widely as a result. The system includes economic incentives for compliance and substantial fines, confiscation of belongings, and dismissal from work for noncompliance. Cities traditionally have been stricter in enforcing the policy, although Beijing, Shanghai and Guangdong province in recent years have allowed families to have two children to counteract declines in population growth. Despite the severe penalties, many couples still get around the law by sending the pregnant woman to stay with relatives until the baby is born or claiming the newborn baby was adopted or belongs to a friend or relative.
The Impact on FemalesIncreased enforcement of the one-child policy, particularly beginning in the late 1980s, has had a huge impact on Chinese families and the nation overall, because of the preference for sons in Chinese society particularly in rural areas. There are many reasons why families prefer to have sons:

  • Longstanding societal preferences in for sons over daughters.
  • In rural areas, sons are believed to perform a heavier workload than girls.
  • Sons carry on a family's ancestral name, while females do not.
  • Inheritance laws pass property through males rarely females and
  • The fact that a son is responsible to care for his parents in their old age, which is important in China because the country does not have an established government-backed
    social security program. Also, traditionally and until recently, wives have shared in the responsibility for caring for their husbands' parents before even their own.

As a result, China reports a higher ratio of male births to female births than anywhere in the world. This is believed to be because many female births are unaccounted for due to a variety of reasons. The effect of this situation is clearly evidenced in the school systems of many areas of China , where male students are predominant.

Infant Abandonment In the past two decades, a significant number of Chinese parents have reacted to various pressures of the one-child policy by abandoning female infants. This practice, while not condoned by the Chinese government, is widespread. Infant abandonment in China takes a variety of forms. In some areas, a childless couple may find an abandoned child on their doorstep. These "informal" adoptions circumvent the many bureaucracies imposed on Chinese couples facing domestic adoption. More frequently, infants are abandoned in public places where they will be found quickly, such as busy streets, parks, railway stations or in front of public buildings. Most abandonments occur within the first two months of life, and usually within the first few days. While this practice may seem shocking in some cultures, the circumstances and decisions faced by parents of these children are extremely complex and difficult.

These abandoned children are generally taken to welfare institutions where they are cared for on minimal resources. Only some of these institutions participate in international adoption programs. Adoptions of Chinese Children Before 1990, China permitted very few international adoptions. For example, adoptions of Chinese orphans by citizens ranged from a low of 10 to a high of 62 in the years between 1986 and 1991. In early 1994, China relaxed its international adoption policies in response to various factors prevalent at that time. Currently, the adoption process is administered by the China Center for Adoption Affairs (CCAA). The program requires that parents, either married or single, be at least 30 but under 45 years old to qualify for a healthy child under the age of 12 months. Older children and children with special needs are available to a wider spectrum of adoptive parents. Potential adoptive parents generally work through an agency that has demonstrated a commitment to child welfare, knowledge of international adoption, appropriate licensing and a professional staff.

Thursday, October 27, 2005


I got a phone call yesterday from Kathy at CCAI. We have been approved! She emailed me the Orientation letter and fee policy agreement. We need to sign it and have it notarized. Here is the letter:

Dear T & C,

Contgratulations! CCAI is pleased to approve your Application for Adoption and send you the first adoption orientation Packet. This pact includes:
1. Fee Policy/Agreement
2. Two Service Agreements, the I171H, Time Sensitive Document
3. USCIS I-600A Information
4. How are we Doing?

Upon receipt of your signed fee agreement, first fee payment and service agreements, we will provide you with the Adoption Dossier Guide. The copyrighted CCAI Adoption Dossier Guide is a thorough compilation of the information you will need to complete your dossier for China. Our families have had great success completing their dossiers on their own with the help of this guide. Compiling the dossier usually takes 3-5 months and costs on an average of $450. CCAI has a team of dossier specialists who will guide you through the dossier process.

And it goes on to say what needs to be signed and notarized. we go! We will be sending off the I600A tomorrow! I need to call Nathanson Adoption Services to set up our homestudy.

I can't believe this is really happening!!

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

It's in the mail!!

Well, my dh has finally seen the light and signed the adoption application!! I sent the application to CCAI yesterday and hope to hear from them by Friday or Saturday. I've already ordered a copy of our marriage certificate and have filled out the I-600A. I'll write a check for the fees tonight and get that out tomorrow. The agency sent me a list of home study agencies I can use here and I will be making phone calls today to see which one we want to use.

We are so excited that this is finally happening after almost a year! The boys are excited about meeting their little sister and can't wait to go to China! I started writting this blog to our daughter but have decided to change it to let family and friends know where we are in the paperchase. Our parents know what we are doing but no one else in the family does. I haven't talked to dh yet to see when he wants to announce our plans.

T - your family is coming soon!! We love you!!

Thursday, August 04, 2005


Hi - I'm starting this to write about our journey to our daughter. We haven't started the paperchase yet but I'm excited that we will very soon. My dh isn't quite on board yet but I know that God will open his heart soon so we can begin. I believe we will be using CCAI as our agency. More to come later.

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